Third Leg of the Stool

I arise in the morning torn between a desire to improve the world and a desire to enjoy the world. This makes it hard to plan the day. [e.b. white]

Definitely not taking care of myself...

During college I worked at an orphanage, where I internalized the pain of the children. I was barely capable of taking care of them, and my health suffered tremendously. It was during that summer and subsequent issues of ill-health due to my desire to do the best for others, that my father began to tell me I needed the third leg of the stool.

I was already hard-working and intelligent.

I was already compassionate for others.

But now I needed to be loving with myself.

I needed to: Rest, Nourish, Fitness, Fun. Only with these things could I sustain myself and do what I wanted to do and be happy.

During a very stressful time in my life I had a conversation with my father… in it he gave me the advice that I have carried with me the past 4.5 years:

• You are building up vast reservoirs of fear and apprehension, you are over demanding of your self…I want you to put some peaceful and loving words about yourself in your vocabulary right now.
• You are going to be fine. Maybe it won’t turn out exactly as it SHOULD, but it will be fine. Slow Down.
• Your job is some loving words about yourself and some gentle space in your soul.
• Positive words. No more fear or panic or dread or depression. Only waves breaking, sunsets, and sweet flowers. It is all in you. It is what you are.
• Rest, Nourish, Fitness, Fun. Don’t forget those.

Having FUN

My father passed away in January 2007– I honor him by making sure that I build the third leg of my stool. That I find peace and beauty everyday, that I nourish my body through food and fitness, I relax and I have fun.

Earth. Wind. Water... Natural Balance.

Believe it or not–I used to not do those things. I used to become wrapped up in my tasks that I punished myself through food and fitness, instead of enjoying it and using it as nourishment. I never relaxed. Now I do– and I am much happier for it.

Peace and Beauty